Nine Can Vegetable Soup

Nine Can Vegetable Soup from World (and Lunar) Domination:

 

This is an incredibly easy & delicious dinner or lunch.

Well, the name’s misleading.  Sometimes it’s not exactly nine cans.  I’ll give you the recipe as it was given to me…

Nine Can Vegetable Soup

  • 2 cans Hormel chili, any variety
  • 1 can vegetable soup
  • 1 can green beans
  • 1 can sliced new potatoes
  • 1 can mixed vegetables
  • 1 can corn
  • 2 cans diced tomatoes (for extra kick, use a can of tomatoes with green chiles in place of one can of diced tomatoes).

Optional: 1lb ground meat*

Dump the entire contents of every can into the crockpot – liquid and

all.

*Brown turkey or beef and drain and add to veggies in crockpot. Heat on low all day, or on high for less than 2 hours.

Well, sometimes I do it like this…

  1. Hormel Chili with Beans
  2. Hormel Chili with No Beans
  3. Campbell’s Beef With Barley & Vegetables Soup
  4. Campbell’s Vegetable Beef Soup
  5. Cut Green & Wax Beans
  6. Diced New Potatoes
  7. Succotash (Corn & Lima Beans)
  8. Mixed Vegetables with Potatoes
  9. Diced Tomatoes with Basil, Garlic, & Oregano
  10. Petit Diced Tomatoes

 

Sometimes I add other stuff.  I think I’ve put in Garbanzo Beans,Mexicorn, or

the diced tomatoes with jalapeño or chili peppers, and even plain old navy or black beans.  Sometimes I dump some of the liquid of the cans out.  I like thick soup.

I’ve used ground beef & ground turkey… both work really well.  I’m sure a vegetarian version of this would be easy to make. (Hormel makes a vegetarian chili, you can get vegetarian vegetable soup from Campbell’s, & the ground tofu, seitan, or tempeh would work well… or you could just add more beans or vegetables.)

I just put it into the crock pot on low all day.  Dinner’s ready when you get home!

I like to have it with homemade bread, or over biscuits like a pot pie.  If you’re camping and have a mountain pie iron or if you have en electric sandwich maker that seals the edges you can add some flour to thicken it up or strain it a little to make incredible filling.

I also like the tiny saltine crackers.

A any rate, we make some & it lasts a while… as a main dish, or a side with sandwiches.  It freezes & re-heats easily.

Do you make something like this?

What are some good soup recipes or easy crock-pot recipes?

Beer Barbecue Sauce / Master the beer barbecue sauce

From:  http://draftmag.com/recipes/detail/234

Beer Barbecue Sauce

Recipe by Caitlin King

Sweet, savory, tangy and ever-so-easy, our beer barbecue sauce goes with everything grillable and is open to experimentation: Pour in a porter when you’re cooking beef, an amber ale for chicken, and something fruity when you’re working with pork.

Serves:

 

Ingredients:

  • 1 tablespoon olive oil
  • 1/3 cup chopped onion
  • 2 tablespoons garlic
  • 2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
  • 2 cups ketchup
  • 2 tablespoons honey Dijon mustard
  • 1 tablespoon molasses
  • 1 tablespoon brown sugar
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • ½ teaspoon black pepper
  • 1/3 teaspoon hot sauce, or to taste
  • 1 cup beer

Instructions:

In a saucepot over medium-high heat, add the oil, onion and garlic; cook until the onions begin to soften, about 4 minutes. Add the Worcestershire sauce, ketchup, honey Dijon, molasses, brown sugar, salt, pepper and hot sauce; bring to a boil, then simmer, uncovered, for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. Remove the sauce from heat and add the beer, . For a smoother sauce, strain out the onions or pulse in a blender.

 

From:  http://draftmag.com/new/feature/master-the-beer-barbecue-sauce/

Master the beer barbecue sauce

Slather a seriously savory (and seriously easy) brew-based barbecue sauce on beef, chicken or pork. Use our basic recipe below, and change the beer according to what you grill.

You’re grilling: beef  Pour in: a porter

A malty beer with a dose of roast makes a thick, rich sauce that stands up to burly beef flavor; a smooth porter laden with chocolate or smoke can muscle its way through all that meat. Heat lovers: Add a teaspoon of chopped chilies or a few dashes of extra hot sauce; a porter base will be thick and sweet enough to handle it.

You’re grilling: chicken  Pour in: an amber ale

Chicken’s moist white meat opens up nicely to the gentle malt flavors of a well-balanced amber; the beer’s caramel notes and pop of citrusy hops are strong enough to counter the smoke and spice that develop on the grill—think sweet meets savory.

You’re grilling: pork  Pour in: a fruit ale

No matter the cut, pork’s a juicy, tender blank canvas. A sweet apricot ale or berry lambic pumps up barbecue sauce’s sweetness; the pork’s earthiness keeps the sugar in check. Fruit acids make them natural meat tenderizers; consider adding chopped fresh or glazed apricots or raspberries into the mix for extra fruit flavor.

Published July/August 2012

Sweet, savory, tangy and ever-so-easy, our beer barbecue sauce goes with everything grillable and is open to experimentation.

Beer for Dinner: Steak and potatoes with lager | Eighteen Twenty Nine

Beer for Dinner: Steak and potatoes with lager | Eighteen Twenty Nine.

via Beer for Dinner: Steak and potatoes with lager | Eighteen Twenty Nine.

 

Beer for Dinner: Steak and potatoes with lager

Crock-pots really are one of the most underrated kitchen accessories. Think about it – you place raw ingredients inside, clamp down the lid, set the temperature to low, and then walk away. Four to eight hours later, dinner is served! In the meantime, it fills your house with the sweet, sweet smell of slow-roasted beef and you can knock out half your to-do list.

 

STEAK AND POTATOES WITH LAGER

INGREDIENTS

  • 1 large onion, quartered, sliced
  • 8 medium potatoes, quartered
  • 1 1/2 to 2 1/2 pounds round steak, cut in 6 to 8 serving-size pieces
  • 1 tablespoon brown sugar, packed
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
  • 1 envelope onion soup mix
  • 1 bottle (12 ounces) Yuengling Lager
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt, or to taste

DIRECTIONS

Combine sliced onion and potatoes in bottom of crock-pot. Arrange steak over vegetables. Combine brown sugar, nutmeg, onion soup mix; sprinkle over the beef. Pour beer over all. Cover and cook on LOW for 6 to 8 hours, until beef is tender. Salt to taste.

Crock❧Pot BBQ Beer Chicken

From:  http://www.howsweeteats.com/2011/10/crockpot-bbq-beer-chicken/

 

Crockpot BBQ Beer Chicken.

October 5, 2011 · 207 comments

What is up with beer and me lately?

I can’t get enough of the stuff.

If I’m telling the truth, I really enjoy cooking with beer much more than I like drinking it. I do like to drink it on occasion, but it’s not always my beverage of choice. However, when it comes to cooking with it?

Best

flavor

ever.

Basically, I love replacing water with alcohol. Always and forever.

And now… a peek into what a mess my kitchen appliances really are.

You don’t even want to see my stand mixer. Or my toaster. Or my food processor. Or my fridge. Or my… everything. I’m a train wreck.

Look at that bun. (Or bum, since that’s what I really just typed.) Don’t you want to do a big trampoline jump on it? So puffy and fluffy and fat.

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that this is the best chicken I have ever made in the crockpot. It might be the best chicken I’ve made, period. And… I make a ton of crockpot chicken. Like really, a ton.

People… I live with a man who seriously eats chicken at least five days a week for lunch and dinner. Sometimes I get insanely creative, but most weeks he gets the short end of the stick when I throw chicken in the slow cooker with, uh… nothing else, just so I don’t have to deal with making him something delicious only to stuff it in five giant tupperware containers. Maybe I do wish you could see my fridge.

 

So, I’m convinced it’s a combination of the perfect marriage between beer, spices (I freakishly love onion powder and smoked paprika together… give it a whirl) and sauce (Bone Suckin‘ is the best) that makes this so amazing. It’s a great meal for a crowd but if you’re smart, you’ll make a big crock for yourself and freeze a bunch for the days when wine drinking and pie eating takes precedence over dinner.

Or is that just me?

Crockpot BBQ Beer Chicken

serves about 8-10

3 pounds boneless, skinless chicken breasts (about 6 large)

1 tablespoon onion powder

1 tablespoon smoked paprika

1 teaspoon garlic powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon pepper

8 ounces of beer (I used a classic amber)

32 ounces of barbecue sauce

Season chicken with onion powder, garlic powder, paprika, salt and pepper. Add to crockpot, then add beer and 24 ounces of barbecue sauce. Cook on low for 8 hours, tossing once or twice if desired. After 8 hours, shred and add remaining barbecue sauce. Serve as desired.

Notes:

1. I’ve found that *thinner* barbecue sauce works better (such as Bone Suckin’ Sauce) than thicker sauce (like Sweet Baby Ray’s). If you choose to use a thicker sauce, you may want to add a little more beer (or liquid) in order for the sauce not to burn and thicken on the edges of the pot. This is also the reason I don’t use my homemade barbecue sauce.

2. If you don’t want to use beer, you can try a ginger ale, chicken stock, or even water.

3. This makes a ton of chicken and I usually freeze immediately freeze a container for later.

I wish I was sandwiched between those buns.

Tagged as: barbecue, beer, chicken, recipes

Chili with SQUASH?

I love squash with a little heat from Paprika or Cayenne… why not chili with squash in it?  I’ll refer to these for inspiration:

☆★☆

☕ From: http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/beef-and-butternut-squash-chili-10000001144129/

Recipes > Beef-and-Butternut Squash Chili

Beef-and-Butternut Squash Chili

We’ve loaded this chili with beef and beans for zinc and B vitamins, tomatoes and green peppers for vitamin C, and butternut squash for beta-carotene.

Worthy of a special occasion

Yield: Makes 8 servings (serving size: 1 cup)

from Southern Living

Recipe Time

Cook Time: 50 Minutes
Prep Time: 20 Minutes

Nutritional Information

Amount per serving

  • Calories: 234
  • Calories from fat: 22%
  • Fat: 6g
  • Saturated fat: 2.3g
  • Monounsaturated fat: 2.3g
  • Polyunsaturated fat: 0.4g
  • Protein: 17g
  • Carbohydrate: 30g
  • Fiber: 6.8g
  • Cholesterol: 21mg
  • Iron: 2.9mg
  • Sodium: 642mg
  • Calcium: 65mg

Ingredients

  • 1 pound extra-lean ground beef
  • 1 green bell pepper, chopped
  • 1 medium onion, chopped
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced
  • 2 (14.5-ounce) cans Mexican-style stewed tomatoes, chopped
  • 1 (16-ounce) can chili beans
  • 1/2 small butternut squash, peeled and cubed (about 1 1/2 cups)
  • 1 cup low-sodium beef broth
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons chili powder
  • 1 cup frozen corn kernels

Preparation

  • Cook beef, bell pepper, and next 2 ingredients in a Dutch oven over medium-high heat until meat crumbles and is no longer pink. Drain well, and return to Dutch oven.
  • Stir in tomatoes and next 5 ingredients; bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Cover, reduce heat to medium-low, and simmer, stirring occasionally, 15 minutes. Stir in corn, and cook, uncovered, 15 minutes or until squash is tender and chili is thickened.

Southern Living
JANUARY 2006

☆★☆

☕ From:  http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/sunny-anderson/beefy-butternut-squash-chili-recipe/index.html

Beefy Butternut Squash Chili Recipe

Beefy Butternut Squash Chili

Sunny AndersonRecipe courtesy Sunny Anderson

Show: Cooking for RealEpisode: Carving Out Some Fun

Rated 4 stars out of 5
Total Time:
1 hr 35 min
Prep
20 min
Cook
1 hr 15 min
Yield:
6 to 8 servings
Level:
Easy

Ingredients

  • 1 tablespoon cumin
  • 1 tablespoon chili powder
  • 1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice
  • 2 teaspoons dry oregano
  • Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
  • 3 tablespoons olive oil
  • 1 pound beef chuck or stewing meat, cut into 1-inch cubes
  • 1 cup finely chopped white onion
  • 1 cup seeded and chopped red bell pepper
  • 3 cloves garlic, grated on rasp or finely minced
  • 3 tablespoons tomato paste
  • 2 tablespoons hot sauce (recommended: Frank’s Red Hot Sauce)
  • 1 pound ground chuck (80-percent lean)
  • 2 tablespoons fine cornmeal
  • 1 1/2 cups red wine (recommended: any inexpensive Chianti)
  • 1 1/2 cups beef stock
  • 1 (1 1/2 pound) butternut squash, peeled, seeded and cut into 1/2-inch cubes

Directions

In a small bowl combine the cumin, chili powder, pumpkin pie spice, oregano, 2 teaspoons salt and a few grinds of black pepper.

In a large pot over medium heat add the olive oil, beef cubes and half of the seasoning. Cook until the beef is browned on all sides, but not cooked through; remove with a slotted spoon to a plate. Add the onions, bell pepper, garlic, tomato paste and hot sauce. Stir and cook until everything turns a dark reddish brown, about 10 minutes. Add the ground beef and sprinkle over the remaining seasoning. Stir and cook until beef is browned then add the reserved beef chunks back to the pot along with the cornmeal, wine, stock, and the squash. Raise the heat until it comes to a boil, then lower to a simmer, cover and cook until the beef is tender, about 40 to 45 minutes. Uncover and let the chili cook another 15 minutes, until it is thick and the liquid is reduced.

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☆★☆

☕ From:  http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Black-Bean-Chili-with-Butternut-Squash-and-Swiss-Chard-234146

Black Bean Chili with Butternut Squash and Swiss Chard

Bon Appétit  | March 2006

Bon Appétit Test Kitchen

user rating

94% would make it again

user rating

user rating:
Black Bean Chili with Butternut Squash and Swiss Chard 3½ forks

at a glance

main ingredients VegetableLeafy GreenButternut SquashBean

cuisine American

type Quick & EasySoup/Stew

dietary considerations VegetarianLow FatLow CalHigh FiberHealthyVegan

yield: Makes 4 main-course servings

active time: 45 minutes

total time: 45 minutes

Top with chopped fresh cilantro, red onions, and grated cheddar cheese, if you like.
  • 2 tablespoons olive oil
  • 2 1/2 cups chopped onions
  • 3 garlic cloves, chopped
  • 2 1/2 cups 1/2-inch pieces peeled butternut squash
  • 2 tablespoons chili powder
  • 2 teaspoons ground cumin
  • 3 15-ounce cans black beans, rinsed, drained
  • 2 1/2 cups vegetable broth
  • 1 14 1/2-ounce can diced tomatoes in juice
  • 3 cups (packed) coarsely chopped Swiss chard leaves (from 1 small bunch)

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Preparation

Heat oil in heavy large pot over medium-high heat. Add onions and garlic; sauté until tender and golden, about 9 minutes. Add squash; stir 2 minutes. Stir in chili powder and cumin. Stir in beans, broth, and tomatoes with juices; bring to boil. Reduce heat and simmer, uncovered, until squash is tender, about 15 minutes. Stir in chard; simmer until chard is tender but still bright green, about 4 minutes longer. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Ladle chili into bowls and serve.

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Read More http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Black-Bean-Chili-with-Butternut-Squash-and-Swiss-Chard-234146#ixzz1bowKPv5V

☆★☆

☕ From:  http://www.meatlessmonday.com/yellow-squash-chili/

Yellow Squash Chili

The addition of sunny yellow squash gives this hearty chili a bright summer flavor. Don’t be afraid to dip your bread straight in the bowl. This recipe comes to us from Grace of Going to Graceland.

  • 1 tablespoons olive oil
  • 1 medium onion, diced
  • 2 cloves garlic, diced
  • 1 large carrot, chopped
  • 1 medium bell pepper, chopped
  • 1 stalk celery, diced
  • 1 zucchini, chopped
  • 1 yellow squash, chopped
  • 1 can black beans
  • 1 can refried beans
  • 1 can kidney beans
  • 2 large cans crushed tomatoes
  • 2 tablespoons chili powder
  • 1 teaspoons oregano

Serves 6

Heat the olive oil in a large stew pot over medium heat.

Sauté the onion, carrot, bell pepper, celery, zucchini, yellow squash in the olive oil for 8-10 minutes or until vegetables are tender.

Add the canned beans, tomatoes, chili powder, and oregano.

Mix and simmer for 20 minutes.

Just before serving, season with salt and pepper to taste.

Serve with bread or crackers.

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Nutrition Information

Yellow Squash Chili
  • Servings per Recipe: 6
  • Amount per Serving
  • Calories: 330
  • Calories from Fat: 45
  • Total Fat: 5.0g
  • Saturated Fat: 1.0g
  • Cholesterol: 6mg
  • Sodium: 1064mg
  • Potassium: 1571mg
  • Total Carbohydrates: 60.2g
  • Dietary Fiber: 18.3g
  • Protein: 16.7g
  • Sugars: 14.5g
  •  
  • View our Nutritional Guidelines
  • The FDA recommends 2000 calories a day as a reasonable average guideline for most adults. Click here to learn how you can use the Monday 2000 to reset the calorie budget you have to spend each day. For specific calorie recommendations based on your age, metabolism and medical history, consult your doctor or nutritionist.

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Crock pot cheese dip…

From my friend Jack (or John) on Google+:

John Washabaughcheese dip in the crock pot. I make 1 lb of taco meat, usually ground turkey, two pound blocks of velveeta, 1 jar of ragu double cheddar sauce, 2 cans of chili (whatever your preference is) and a bag of mexican blend shredded cheese. Just melt everything together in the crockpot, and take a couple bags of tortilla chips.

Mike Hype used to make “Dion Dogs”… I think it was just Velveeta and Hormel Chili… mixed in a crock pot & slathered on top of unsuspecting hot dogs.  It was also almost always guaranteed to cause gastrointestinal distress.
At any rate… this is a reminder that:
(pretty much) anything + cheese + Crock❦Pot = awesome.

Pittsburgh Chipped Ham BBQ

This is how we had chipped ham BBQ when I was growing up…

It was put in a pot on the stove & just heated until it was ready.  It has to be Heinz, it has to be Coke (No Pepsi, RC Cola, or Faygo.)

None of the pre-made sauce either.

It needs to go on a nice roll, like Cellone’s.  I never added cheese as a kid, but I like it with a nice Swiss or Brick cheese these days.

I’ve done a large amount of this in a crock pot… several pounds of meat, then eye the ketchup & Coke.

Chipped Ham BBQ
Pittsburgh Style Chipped Ham BBQ

Chili à la AiXeLsyD

Originally from a post at PittsburghBeat.com, here’s a few consolidated chili recipe/methods…


I’ve never made chili before, and in researching, I came across 50 billion recipes. So, this morning I made my own in the crock pot…

  • 2 cans of condensed tomato soup
  • 1 can of tomato paste
  • 1 packet of chili mix
  • about ½ cup of water
  • 1 tsp. of beef bullion
  • 1 can light red kidney beans
  • however much ground meat was leftover from last night
  • 1 tsp. cumin
  • 1 tsp. black pepper
  • a dash of cayenne pepper
  • a dash of paprika
  • a dash of garlic

…and I slapped it into the crock pot on low for 8 hours.

Hope it tastes good when I get home. I’ve got shredded cheddar cheese for the top of it, & Super-Pretzels to go along with it. They always served pretzels & chili in my elementary school cafeteria so they belong together in my warped mind.

…Most of them use tomato paste, soup, sauce, juice, or diced tomatoes as a base… I even saw one that called for Spicy hot V8… and I think my mom always used soup. Tomato paste is usually bitter, so I figured the tomato soup would counteract it. All of the spices should be rockin’. I like my chili thick.

Oh yeah, about 1/2 the ground meat was cooked w/ some seasoning salt & A1.


Here’s what basically went into my chili. I’ll probably eventually make a blog about it with a narrative so I can remember what I did this time for next time… to see what I wanna change or what I wanna do again.

CannedStuff.jpg

ChiliSeasoningPackets.jpg

Spices.jpg

Peppers.jpg

Peppers-Diced.jpg

RedHot.jpg

groundbeef-inpackage.jpg

groundbeef-MEAT.jpg

groundbeef-littlepan-raw.jpg

groundbeef-bothpansonstove.jpg

groundbeef-bigpan-cooked.jpg

chili-pre-cooked-incrockpot-lidoff.jpg

chili-pre-cooked-incrockpot-lidon.jpg

crockpot-overflowingmaybe.jpg

crockpot-fatontop.jpg

crockpot-fatskimmedoff.jpg

I ended up only using the one can of diced tomatoes (the one with jalapeños) and still kind’ve overflowed the pot by a small amount. So, next time I may cut out one can of tomato soup or a can of beans. Also, I want to try garbanzo beans in my next batch… and I’ve heard chocolate powder goes good in chili some times… so I wanna try that one day too.

I also tossed in 2 slices of Velveeta ripped apart, a dash of spicy brown mustard, and a drop or 2 of A1 Cracked Peppercorn Steak Sauce.

I think the meat that I used was too fatty or I didn’t drain enough fat (…even though I got a about ⅔ of a regular sized plastic cup full of fat out of it). I had to skim some excess grease off of the top when I popped it open this morning.

I’ll let you know the general consensus after it’s been consumed.

Stuffing Recipe – Thanksgiving 2009

Stuffing has got to be my favorite Thanksgiving food.  I remember Thanksgivings past where my dad & I would fight over the stuffing bowl like it was filled with gold, diamonds, and (for me) guitars.  The stuff is perfect.  Alone, with turkey, with gravy… the decadent amount of carbs is ridiculously awesome.

Last year was my first ever attempt at making stuffing… and my grandma told me that it tasted just like hers.  Is there a compliment better than that?  I had used as a guide an old recipe that my grandfather & grandmother had both used when making holiday meals.  My mom lent me the old cook book with my grandfather’s notes last year, I collected some others, and I made scans for myself.

I say “guide” because it’s not always an exact science when doubling/tripling recipes… and there really aren’t any cooking directions… it’s just a guide to make the stuff.  Also, I tend to do a lot of “oh, that looks about right” and a little bit of “hey, let’s add a little of this” in the kitchen, as most people comfortable there usually do.

A lot of times I see stuffing recipes online, on TV, or in the little books by the cash register at the grocery store… and they include sausage, apples, raisins, (yuck!) nuts, or even peppers, carrots, or mushrooms (all of the latter of which I’ like to try some time).  The philosophy behind this recipe seems to be a K.I.S.S. one.  I like that.  It’s a very simple accompaniment, and the taste that my mind goes to every time I think “stuffing”.

This year, it was definitely a two person effort.  I don’t know how I would have done it without Bethany and all four of our hands.  We made a lot of stuffing.  Sadly, I didn’t think to chronicle the thing with photos like I sometimes do with new recipes… but I did want to make a guide with my own notes, so when I do this next year, I remember what I did differently this year.  I know I altered things slightly last year, but the details were a little fuzzy.  I figured that if I’m going to do it for myself, I might as well share, right?  Plus, we got compliments from two moms, two grandmas, and an aunt… all excellent in the kitchen themselves!

I did take a photo today, because really, what’s a food blog post without a photo?  Perhaps I’ll see if my mom got any with her camera and amend the post later.

Thanksgiving Stuffing 2009
This year’s effort was delicious, if I do say so myself.

This is my first time really writing out a recipe… so pardon me if it’s a little convoluted or long winded.  I don’t want to miss anything, and I hope to get it all in the right order as well as make it an entertaining read.

Here’s what you’ll need to do it the same way I did…

Food:

  • 5 loaves of bread (equaled 56 cups once cubed)
  • 1 bundle of celery (3 cups, chopped – the rest can cook w/ the turkey or be a snack)
  • 2 Spanish or Sweet onions
  • The giblets & neck out of your turkey.
  • 1 can (14½ oz.) vegetable broth
  • 1 tablespoons of salt
  • ½ tablesppon Season All Seasoned Salt
  • 1 heaping teaspoon coarse ground black pepper
  • 1 heaping teaspoon sage
  • 1 heaping teaspoon poultry seasoning
  • 10 eggs
  • 4 sticks (2 cups) butter
  • some water
  • 1 cup fresh parsley
  • 1 bottle of Yuengling

Stuff:

  • 2 cookie sheets
  • cutting boards
  • small pot
  • electric skillet
  • Magic Bullet®
  • electric roaster
  • large crock pot
  • knives
  • a few large bowls
  • whisk
  • spatula
  • several large spoons
  • paper towels

OK, on to the directions…

  1. Monday night, get your loaves of bread, open the bags, and put the loaves on cookie sheets before dinner.  Leave ‘em out on a table or counter while you do your thing.
  2. Right before your favorite prime time TV shows come on, set up a station on the coffee table in front of the couch with the cookie trays of bread, some cutting boards with knives, and the pans out of your electric roaster.  Cube the bread and fill the roasting pan.  When I say fill it, I mean fill it.  It will be ridiculously full.
  3. Cover it with paper towels, and set it on the kitchen table that you only use when company comes over anyway.  Over the next few days, stir it a few times a day, whenever you think of it.  This will get it nicely & slightly stale.  If you’re going to be doing anything that smells, like using cleaning chemicals, put it in the oven… but don’t turn it on.  It’s nice & warm & dry & not stinky in there.  The bread will absorb that stuff and the stuffing will taste like Mr. Clean made it.
  4. Wednesday night, get out your turkey… and pull the disgusting papery bag of giblets out of the neck cavity, and the neck out of its butt.  (Why exactly do they put the neck in the butt, anyway?  Who’s idea was that?) Boil the giblets in your can of vegetable broth, or just use plain water… or even turkey or chicken broth.  I thought the vegetable broth would add a nice flavor.  I boiled them for a nice long time, and let it cook down quite a bunch.
  5. Finely chop up your celery & onions… or use the Magic Bullet, like I did.  I’m not real big on chunks of slimy or crunchy stuff in bread-like consistency foods.  I probably had half of each chopped finely, the other half rendered to near-paste by the genius little piece of equipment that list the Magic Bullet.  I’m sure any food processor would work.. but this one is easy to pot pout of storage, use, and clean when you’re done.
  6. Then I popped out the electric skillet to sauteé the onion & celery mixture… probably in some Country Crock & a bit of extra virgin olive oil… adding some of the spices mentioned above, and maybe even some paprika… although, they don’t come the totals listed above.  These are the aforementioned “oh, that looks about right” and  “hey, let’s add a little of this”.  You’ve sauteed stuff, you know how it works.  I love this step because it turns the onions from gross into awesome… especially the Spanish onions.  The sweet onions are oddly enough not as sweet to me when cooked.
  7. Next time, I’m totally getting a pair of swimming goggles or those glasses that I’ve seen at Bed, Bath & Beyond for when I chop & pulverize the onions.  I was crying like a little girl who just watched a car run over a kitten.
  8. I popped the onions and celery into separate containers for the ‘fridge to save for Thursday morning.
  9. Next, I pulled out the giblets and chopped them into tiny pieces, & put them with the reduced broth from cooking into a 3rd refrigerator bound container to be used on Thursday morning.
  10. Go to bed.  You have to get up early.
  11. Thursday get up about an hour before your turkey needs to go in the roaster oven, and start to mix all this crap together.
  12. Add the dry spice ingredients to the now stale-ish cubed bread.  Good luck not getting any on the floor.
  13. Chop the fresh parsley.
  14. Nuke your butter in a microwave safe bowl, add it to a large mixing bowl, crack open the 10 eggs, and whisk away.
  15. Add the fresh parsley to the buttery gooey egg mixture.
  16. Add 2-3 cups of the broth from the giblets, and the finely chopped giblets to the now even gooier butterier egg mixture.
  17. This is where I got the bright idea to dump in some Yuengling.  It wasn’t a whole bottle… but I had it out & only needed about ½ cup for my butter/garlic/beer turkey injection/baste,  so I dumped some into the gooey buttery gibletey mixture, and drank the rest… all before 8:00 am.
  18. Dump the celery & onion concoction on to the bread, mix around, and then dump on the gooey buttery gibletey Yuenglingey mixture.  This is where it was imperative that there were two of us.  Bethany opted to use her hands to mix while I poured.  The mixing gets easier when it’s wet, as it goes down a little.  You should probably wash your hands before you do this.  Not that I think you’re stupid or anything… but there are signs out there all over the place… so someone somewhere must need reminded.  Use soap, and hot water.
  19. Now, this needs to come out of the roaster so the turkey can go into it… and you should be doing this around the same time as turkey prep… so stuff what you can into the turkey carcass’ various cavities, and put the rest in the crock pot.  I had Bethany scoop it into a bowl small amounts at a time as I stuffed it into the bird, so I wasn’t touching raw poultry and the stuffing that wasn’t going into the bird.  She made it clear that she wasn’t touching the raw dead bird, or sticking her hands into it.
  20. I sewed up the turkey and popped it into the roaster to cook, and then put the stuffing in the crock pot on low to cook for the same amount of time.
  21. Everyone told me last year that stuffing + crock pot = bad idea.  This is where I say that you could not be more wrong.  It was perfectly moist and heated well throughout.  I did break the cardinal cock pot rule by removing the lid every hour or so and stirring a little so it didn’t stick to the sides or burn.  This worked well, except that I didn’t get the bottom well enough.  You could add more liquid throughout if t looked necessary… or not stir if you like the crusty part as much as the other part.  If you use the crock pot enough, you get to know what works for yours.  Pop it on to warm or off a while before you eat.
  22. When the turkey’s ready, the stuffing’s ready.  Stuff yourself silly, send people home with leftovers, and eat for breakfast, lunch, & dinner the next day.

Well, I hope you enjoyed the process, and I’m sorry for jumping tenses.  I think I did anyway.  All over the place.  Maybe Dave and Kristin can give me some pointers on that.

I’d love to know what you think of this recipe, and how you do your stuffing.  I’m always up for trying things new ways… and I’m always up for eating stuffing.  In fact, even better — make some, and invite me over for dinner!